it's 1252am

it's now 12plus am in the morning,just got home from dinner/supper at NUS,the cheese prata shop..yummy..ate banana and cheese prata...slurp~ but like not filling leh..maybe too hungry liao..whole day didnt eat..

it was gibby's bdae..feel so sorry...too busy to wish him happi birthday in the morning and afternoon..went home to slp..onli managed to wish him at about near 8plus...gibby..here..i wanna wish you happi birthday..all the best...in this new yr ahead of you..be happi..and remember i'll be here yar...keke..here's a birthday hug for you...*hUgz*

sighz..sad...the kopitiam where my stall is has changed management and damn it...i gotta move..coz the new boss thinks our rent is too low..sianz..gotta find a new place...argh..it totally pissed and discouraged mi...it's a sucky new yr for mi...this yr just sux full time...

sighz..no mood.....byebye

ending soon...

hey peepz...i'm going to evaluate the year 2004 in this post...gone through many many ups and downs...

During the 1st quarter of the yr (January - March)..hmm..actually cant realli remembermuch..but i suppose it was quite smooth for mi..everything went well for mi..in terms of r/s,career or family...

During the 2nd quarter (April - June)...grown up to be an adult..21yrs old..but it's realli tough and torturing..ended my r/s of 2yrs+ in such a way that left mi with nothing..i love him so so much..and yet he left mi without any signs...it left mi depressed..though for some reasons i managed to be strong once againvery soon..but it left mi looking haggard for a few months..the onli ways to stop thinking about it is to keep clubbing and drinking..led a realli terrible lifestyle then..but ohwell well..i'm strong again~!!! yeah baby~!!! you think you can defeat mi!?!? NO WAY!!! (yes i'm tokking to you~!!!)

During the 3rd quarter (July - September)..worked hard..played hard..flirted real hard..laughed hard..cried even harder..became real close to 2 gd frens..coreen and yanti..they were there for mi all the time..cried with mi..laughed with mi..i realli realli appreciate their care and love showered on mi...thankz sisters..this period of time was oso a chance formi to slowly search for the frens i've lost due to the r/s..tried very hard even up till this moment..but i'll continue todo my best...

During the last quarter (October - December)..managed to find back my very good buddy..sharon..thankz alot darling~..changed my job from a sales girl to a full time office staff (though i hate office jobs!!)..michelle is back from australia..which is one of the happiest thing happening to mi..and one more amazing thing..and that's caline..my old best sister..gladwe're able to be back in contact again..realli praying i wont lose you again...thankz for everything..found gib too...(hey you!!thankz for being there for mi..u noe when right?keke..)..managed to open my nasi lemak stall..hopefully it'll prosper..

This year..is very meaningful to mi..suffered alot..and enjoyed alot too..wanna say thanks to everyone..esp yanti,coreen,zen,michelle,caline,sharon,henry,katty,rayden,jordan,jianwei,gibson and many more...thanks guys/gals for being there with mi..thanksfor bearing with my nonsense and short n hot temper..i realli love all of you.. *muackz*

Hopefully and praying hard that 2005 will be a better year for mi..hope i'll be able to find my the other half soon..to take care of miand to protect and love mi..to be able to do well in my career as well as my stall..to be a better fren and daughter...and..to be able to startto save alot of money...just in case i cant get married in future..hahaha...

okok...ending here..let's count down to a brand new year together frens~!!!let's stand strong together no matter wat happens too..i love all of you! esp you....hee

zzz..

hey wow...it's already the 3rd day of xmas..time passes so fast..and a new yr is coming..in another 5 days...woOooOO...super fast..now i'm sitting on my chair...tokking to gib..and thinking of wat i've achieved...oh well...i think i'll evaluate later this wk...

damn..just as my frens were admiring my nails last fri...my nail broke yesterday...shit..after leaving it for so long..taking care of it...it broke~!!! poor nail....so heart pain...

hmm..it's my off day today...tok to gib online until abt 3am++...playing with my webcam..keke..making stupid faces at him...and damn..he saw how messy my room was...so paiseh...lolx...din prepare..

hmm...suddenly got the urge to eat nasi lemak..though i'm selling it~!!! keke...hmm...the thinking of biting into the chicken wing and chewing the crunchy peanuts just makes mi excited...yummy~~~!!! kekek..greedy piggy..keke

hey peepz...if u guys ever go and eat mac...pls...help mi buy the neopets hor..hahah...i wanna collect but..i dun wanna eat...scared fat la..keke..pls...do mi a favour la....pls...kekeke...

oh well...another day has passed..did nth much today...nth much to say...end here...short and sweet...

iT's xMazZz

hey ppl..xmas is here..wanna wish everyone out there..MERRY CHRISTMAS~!!! *hugZ*

sighz..though it's my fav festival..i cant celebrate...it realli sux to the max for mi...count down at the kopitiam..selling nasi lemak...drinking sasi..where's my dream christmas where i can dress very beautifully and having dinner in a posh restaurant with someone i love?dreams are realli dreams...but oh well..a dream is always the most beautiful thing...

cant believe i'm actually at home waiting some stephen chow show on tv..xmas eve sux..even my xmas sux too...alone at hm..noone to tok to..argh..boring...sigh..reali no mood to continue this post any further..

thx to someone who spent xmas with mi over sms last night..though it's just a short while..it's more than enuff...*hUgZ*

merry christmas...santa is now on the way bak hm with his reindeers..

fRozEn

aiyoz...it's so damn cold inside this refrigerator-like office..it's freezing mi to death..my hands are already numb while i'm typing this post and chatting with gibby..feel like soaking myself in a bathtub filled with warm bubble bath..so shiok..lolx..

omg..tmr is xmas eve liao..which means xmas is coming!! my favourite festival of the year..a day of exchanging gifts and love...but oh well..this time..i confirm gotta slog at the stall..but den again..why not right...earning money is the most impt thing at this stage of life..this world is just so realistic...money money money...sighz..

glad to know someone has finally thought it through..hope he'll realli be happi..realli sad to see a fren unhappi...HEY YOU..JIA YOU OK!!~~ hee

been quite unhappi this two days..hasnt been tokking to one of my frens...i feel my kindness has been taken for granted..feel realli sad..why does this world contain such ungrateful ppl..i realli realli wanna knoe why adam and eve ate that apple...sighz...if not..i think this world will just be perfect..

hate those ppl walking past my office and always looking in with a stupid and disgusting kind of look..esp men...just because there's a massage center with 'extra services' opposite my office..does it mean my office is one which provides those services too?anyone who walks past with that 'look' will just get a 'xia lan' face from mi...and sometimes if i'm realli fed up...i'll just shout at them..hahaha...rude ger...but i dun give a damn...

hao ba...that's all for now...need to go for a walk..too cold....*sniff sniff* my nose giving problem again...goosebumps all over my pig skin..haha...

wanna wish all a MERRY XMAS~!! *muackz*

countdown to xmas

jingle bells jingle bells...wOooOo hOoOOOoo another 3 days and santas claus is coming!!but one sad thing is..up till today i still dunno if i'll be able to celebrate xmas or i gotta continue slogging at the food stall all the way through xmas eve..oh god...pls...spare mi..

hmm...waiting for my breakfast to be delivered..it's already near 11am..guess i gotta delay my lunch to about 2 then..i'm living in such an unhealthy lifestyle..

aHhhhHHh chHOoo~ *bless me* opps..just let off a very loud sneeze..who's missing mi??

hmm..was quite unhappy with someone..i realli dun understand why he should continue to feel so unhappi about wat happened...come on bro..wat has happened already happened..you cant go bak to the past..wat's most impt now is to live life ahead in a more meaningful way..and gotta be strong you gotta let her see that you're living happily even without her by your side..do you think she'll feel guilty over her actions?bro...you haf yr frens by your side..that's the most impt thing..i realli believe all yr true frens will stand by you all the way no matter how hard it is..well..i'm one of them..cheer up ok.. *hUgZ*

wOooo..my breakfast set of bread and eggs and ice milo is here..argh..i'll surely get a stomachache after consuming such a combination...

oh well..it's another short blog..main aim is to let this fren of mine noe my point of view..and really hope to see him bak to his naughty behaviour again..keke

oh well...

yawnz...feeling tired but cant slp..feeling hungry but cant eat..feels a little like shit now..feel like getting out of the house for some fresh air but too late liao...

hmm...keke..my fren caline gave mi a stupid idea which i had been thinking of for quite some time...to do a TATTOO..wow...dunno if i should do it...keep worrying that i will regret it..and that it'll fade off and i gotta suffer the pain again..well well...lemmi think again...sighz...

wanna say something to gibby here...hey boi...cheer up hao ma?it realli hurts to see u like tat leh..dun wish to see a fren suffering so much..the way u talk to mi these past few days realli sounds veri terrible...pls la....dun think so much ok?you haf us frens to go through thick and thin with you..always turn to us if u need us ok?? hugZz..

well...i'll juz post a short one for tonight...brain getting slower....ciaoz...ZzzZZzz

DoWn wIF a CoLd

aHhhHHhhh cHOoOOooo..aiyoz..been feeling terrible since last night...i think i'm infected with a flu virus..been sneezing non-stop since i woke up this morning..my nose is running away..trying my best to grab hold of it..hmm..this reminded mi about my admission to the hospital sometime last october..had some viral fever thingy..no medicine to eat..had about 5 pkts of drip..the doctors just leave mi in a corner of the surgical ward..it's as though they're leaving mi there to die..the ward was occupied by mainly old women..those dying ones...it definitely didnt do mi any good..kept mi busy imagining that i'll die..nobody to take care of mi..not even my mum...at least those dying old women has a maid..i have nothing...remembered i woke up in the middle of the night having a real high fever..wat the nurse can do is onli to give mi ice pack...terrible..scary..how i wished my frens didnt leave my bedside a few hrs ago...well..now that i'm well again..just wanna tell everyone..you guys gotta take care of yrselves..when you're sick..pls go see doc...the feeling of staying in the hospital isnt fun at all..

aHHhh cHoooO..hmm..gotta go do some shopping for christmas...and wow..i have to be a santa claus for 12 ppl...goin to go broke..lolx..where's my santa claus?!?!?!i wan one too....*sobz*..keke..

argh...not onli my nose is killing mi..the drilling upstairs is killing mi too~!!! how am i going to do my work like tat??my speaker has got to go on full blast...and i still have a little difficulty catching the songs playing..

oh well..gotta go bak to work again..gotta crack my brain and think of wat to have for lunch again..and gotta start sneezing again....aHHhhhHh...cHooOOOoo~~!! *bless mi*

ultra bored

it's wed..as usual...bored as ever..singing songs from FIR's album..in the office..lolx..hopefully passerbys wont be able to hear mi...

sighz..been thinking through..i think i realli need a break..away from everything here in singapore..even if it's a short one..i'm contented..but where the hell should i go and with who??really have no idea..heard from my frens that Redang Island will be nice..hmm..anyone can suggest to mi a nice place?and a SAFE one..no bombings..no rapist..no robberies..lolxx..i'm thinking too much...

hmm..wed...got the urge to club again..to destress myself...but come to think of it..it may be just a form of escape from all the unhappiness in reality..

hmm..another sad story..but it can be considered a happi one too..my fren juz broke up with her bf..i think she felt it as a form of relief..maybe they're realli just meant to be frens..i've learnt something from this incident again...smtimes it's realli pointless if u just hang on to smthing which isnt there anymore..it'll just waste yr time and energy..why not find smthing new to lean on..it may just last a lifetime...it's always good to try to find a new pillar..even if it doesnt stand strong..at least u've tried..

alright...gotta start work again~~..sianz...it's just another boring day....

yAwNZz..

y@wNzZ

today is monday..it's been long since i came home for dinner with my mum...though my mum din say anything..i can tell she's happy...and i feel great too..as days goes by..i feel there's a heavier resposibility to be with my mum...fulfiling the duties tat a daughter should do..though some things are small..but they will mean so much to my mum...i love her...but smtimes juz doesn't noe how to express it to her...hopefully she can noe from the small things i do...

hmm..juz managed to finish baking my cookies...taste nice..but dunno y..quite soft leh..but anyway good try..keke..hmm..someone says he'll definitely finish them if nobody appreciates it..keke..hey.hey...i din force you ok...but well...i'll try again next time..gob..dun worry..u'll haf yr share as well...more choc right?lolx

hmm..another has passed juz like tat...christmas is getting nearer and nearer..but still no idea how to spend it..gotta shop for pressies soon liao...it means $$ is goin out..hehe..wat to do...as long as my loved ones are happi..i dun mind...realli hope one day i'll be able to spend a white christmas (but nt at tanglin mall ok..) lolx..gtg...ending the day with this short post...

i'm missing you...so much....

it's friday..part 2

just came bak from tampines..seems like it's going to rain heavily..but i love it..can sleep comfortably..but juz afraid i won't be able to wake up in time for work tmr..

went shopping juz now..so many temptations..but gotta control myself...feel so uncomfortable..lolx..

met my fren juliana..told mi about the sickness she got last 2 mths..some kind of psychological sickness...the docs dun even noe wat's the cause..it's so scary...she told mi she can see 'stuff'...and even see herself in the 'other' world...gotta go bomoh and get some holy water to drink...luckily she got well already..hope she'll be fine...

i learn smthing through her experience...smtimes..it's reali hard to predict when we're going to fall ill...and of coz...when we'll die...i juz noe tat...we human got to put in the best effort in watever we do..live a happi life everyday...it may be easy to say...but..well...just gotta try...

sianz...tmr sat but still gotta work half day...but well..can see yanti..keke..

hmm..christmas is coming liao...juz another 2 wks..i have so many things on my wish list..wondering who'll be my santa claus...haha..gibby...where's my furniture?no furniture..no ipod..lolx..kidding la hor~~ hmm..still thinking of how i am goin to spend christmas..am i old already or it's juz getting more boring every yr?

well..another day has passed just like tat...hope tmr will be a happi day for me, my frens and family....

santa claus is coming to town...

it's friday..

look at the time now..and i'm already at home..supposed to go make police report..but i'm juz so lazy..dun even bother if someone took my ic to borrow money from loasharks..

so hungry..so sleepy...was all alone in the office today..yanti's on leave..went for lunch with auntie juliet..complained to mi about her work..and one of our ex colleague..missed auntie juliet so much..she's still so caring towards mi..still can remember clearly that she was one of the 'supporters' who stood by mi when my ex bf of two yrs left mi...still remember how i can juz stand at my counter and burst into tears out of a sudden..she'll always comfort mi..telling mi i gotta be strong and i'll definitely find a much better bf who can realli take care of mi..thankz juliet..

i miss yanti..felt so weird not seeing her today..sighz...so bored too...she'll always be the one who makes mi laugh when i'm down..i realli treasure her so so much..i can never lose her...i can say she's the onli one who knows mi best in this world..someone who'll never complain about my bad temper...i love ya darling sista~

goin out soon...though i 'm lazy..juz feel like staying at home..but i gotta move my butt off the chair and go haf dinner...will be back again tonight to continue part 2 for today...

i'm physically so tired..and mentally as well.....

bRrrRR~~~

so cold here in my office..so slpy too...time is passing so slowly..noone to entertain mi...

sighz...i'm so moody now..went clubbing last night..and f**k...lost my stupid IC(an excuse to change my ugly photo)..lolx...but so weird..it din affect my mood last night..i could still continue to enjoy..guess i was a little drunk already..it onli affected mi today when my colleague reminded mi to make police report..to think i can forget about such an important thing..my brain is slowly defunctioning i guess..

so many things on my mind...so many problems..wan to settle..but i have no idea where to start from..can someone please help?God...please send someone to me...but of coz..a suitable person..

going to meet a good fren of mine later after work...it's been long since i last met her..missed her so much..so much to tell her...going to have dinner then coffee and of coz some shopping~!! keke..so excited..

3 hrs more to go...gotta bear with the cold..and gotta keep my soon-to-close eyes OPEN!! arGhHhh~~~~

where are you....?

my very first posting

well..this is my very first posting..don't really know wat to write..

this is the month of December already..not much achievements..din contribute much in anything too..juz praying i'll be able to set up my food stall before the new year comes..so much preparations..problems..but i'm lucky to have my good frens to support me through this time of ordeal..

so boring in the office...glad that i have someone else to entertain mi to pass my time other than my colleague cum best fren cum 'sister'...he's none other than gibby..lolx..opps..found him after he's gone missing for 4yrs..and tat's long...but it's never too late..wanna say sori to him..coz i was too busy to meet him for dinner..keep fly him aeroplane..keke..sori sori~~

sighz..gotta go work liao...hopefully the next few hours wun be so tormenting...

i miss you......so so much...